The Power of Death
When talking about life balances, I always bring up the point that no one ever runs a marathon without knowing how long it is first, as when you know the distance and the date of the race, the process of reverse engineering becomes much easier. That said, when people are given news about how much time they have left to live, what we tend to see is a brief moment of depression followed by an intense desire to finish their race with an elevated sense of purpose. And so it’s within this space of intentional living that we most often notice the power of death on full display.
As we know, the lives we lead are reflective of all our past decisions (good, bad, and indifferent). And when it comes to decision types, the only two that exist are made in the name of one-off experiences (instant gratification) and habits needed to support an outcome, like finishing a marathon (delayed gratification). Well, when I look at successful people who live life on purpose, one of the things they all have in common is a healthy respect for death, as just like running a marathon, it gives them the ultimate context for decision making.
The funny thing about death is that while we know it’s certain, we still react to it when someone dies as if we never saw it coming EVER. Death isn’t an issue of “if,” it’s an issue of “when.” And given that we see it fit to steward the attention of our youth towards a focus on getting the right grades for the eventual right job, one would think that a serious conversation about their eventual death would also be introduced at some point. After all, isn’t balance predicated upon establishing two end points? Where you are and where you want to be? Or in this case, where you’re going to be? But every time someone passes away, so many people are continually caught with their pants down, paralyzed by both the shock of the loss and the logistical process that’s to follow in reconciling the legal affairs of the dearly departed. But just imagine the world we’d get to live in if we prepped our youth with a preliminary understanding and respect for the end-game. Just imagine how it might affect the mental filter by which they make important life decisions through. After all, if you already understand the process of the end game, and have an idea as to how you want it to play out, I can’t imagine that you’d do anything to potentially compromise that vision you’ve created for yourself. And since you can’t value what you don’t understand, it’s hard for me to imagine that a discounting of the value of time can still yield an elevated sense of self worth. Meaning, if we don’t see the value in searching for our own intrinsic worth, then I can’t imagine that we’d bother to accord the same benefit to anyone else.
So again, the value of rearticulating death in this way is that it can create a beautiful watershed moment where all of our priorities in life are suddenly made clear, as we’re never closer to life than when we’re on the precipice of death. And when we learn to see the power of death in this way, it becomes easier to see the value of applying it to all of the micro aspects of our lives, such as seeking to embrace the continual death of old ideas that no longer serve us.
Suggested Takeaways…
a) The power of death is reflected in our ability to gain instant clarity for how we want the narrative of our lives to read leading up to our own passing.
b) The life we lead is reflective of all the good, bad, and indifferent decisions we’ve ever made. And since the suffix -cide means “to kill”— which gives clarity to words like suicide, homicide, pesticide, and insecticide—the word decide means “to kill an opposing idea.” Therefore, good decisions are the ones that are in supportive alignment with how we want the end to play out.
c) The degree to which we’re able to appreciate life is to the degree that we can respect and appreciate the serendipities of death.